A visit from The Landlord

The Landlord:  [Simultaneously knocking and opening the door]  Well, there you are.  I was starting to wonder.  You do know you haven’t said a word in here since March 13?

Myself: I do.

The Landlord: Well you know we can’t be having this.  You can’t be in here with the lights turned on doing nothing.

Myself: Is there a piper to be paid in this somewhere?

The Landlord: There is.  If you want to keep this room you have better deliver some eyeballs or you will find yourself out of the street pronto.  This is not a charity we are running here.  Do you catch my drift?

Myself:  I do.  Your drift is clear.  I will see what I can do.

The Landlord: Do.  And be quick about it!

Myself:  Right.  Well.  How about this bit of news?  On May 31st as part of their celebration of the ongoing Short Story Month, the lovely folk over at Akashic Books will be posting a short story of mine here or hereabouts http://www.akashicbooks.com/category/short-story-month/

The Landlord:  That it?  Well you better rustle up some eyeballs ‘cos I’ll be watching the stats.  No eyeballs, no room.  You’ll be out on yer ear.  Do you hear me? [Exit leaving door to bareboard landing ajar]

Myself:  I do.   [Front] Right so, you heard the man.   Send your friends’ eyeball here or I’ll be sharing an attic room with some model boat enthusiasts on blogspot or something.

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2 Responses to A visit from The Landlord

  1. Laura says:

    My eyeballs are here

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