Another visit from the landlord

The landlord:   [Simultaneously knocking and opening the door] I’ve come about them eyeballs.

Myself:  Oh, there you are!  Sure I left them out on the landing for you on Friday.

The landlord:  Friday?  Friday?  What would you be doing that for?  Sure wasn’t I away in Thurles on Friday!

Myself:  I told you they wre coming on Friday!  Well there were eyeballs galore on Friday.

The landlord:  There were, were there?

Myself:  There were sure the story was up and all on the internet and twitterverse and all sorts.

The landlord:  Where?  Show me.

Myself:  Sure look at here:

The landlord:  Is that it?

Myself:  It is.

The landlord:  I prefer historical romance.

Myself:  You surprise me.

The landlord:  Don’t get smart with me, me bucko.  Right then, we are all square for June then but don’t you fall behind again.  [Exit leaving door ajar bhind him]

Myself: [sotto voce] Were ye born in a barn or a hospital with swinging doors, ye ignorant muck savage?

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